17 Foods Guys Order on a First Date and What They Mean
Cosmopolitan decodes this one for us!
“1. Steak. Steak on the first date means he’s trying to impress you. He’s a manly man who wakes up early, goes hunting, chops down trees, grills every piece of food he eats, and drinks whiskey straight from the bottle. Or at least, that’s what he desperately wants to be. That, or he just wants food he can eat with a knife and fork and cut into small enough bites. It’s advantageous for a few reasons: It minimizes the chance he’ll look like an idiot shoving a huge bite of something into his mouth; he won’t get any sauce on his clothes; and it’s not going to blow up his intestines later.
2. Pasta. This is the first-date steak of Italian restaurants.
3. A four-course meal. He makes a horrible first impression and needs all the time he can get to bring you around. He might even send the waiter away three times before finally ordering.
4. Soup. He’s 65 years old. At least.
5. BBQ ribs. This man is an animal. He doesn’t care. He’s going to eat food with his hands and get sauce all over his face and fingers and stare you in the eyes while he does it. No fear. This guy is either alpha or just crazy. Possibly both.
6. Anything with onions and/or garlic. He’s already given up and knows there will be no kiss at the end of the night. He can tell you hate him.
7. Burger. He’s just a regular guy eating regular food. Average Joe. His name is probably actually Joe. Probably only wears jeans and listens to the radio in his car. He’s just whatever. He’s always down for anything. He probably shrugs a lot when you ask him questions.
8. Lobster. He’s hoping you’re going to ask to split the bill. He’s going to go, “Oh, are you sure? I mean … we don’t have to, but if you want. Yeah, we can.” He’s not even listening to what you’re saying. He’s just rehearsing this over and over in his head so he can look really casual about being cheap when the date finally comes.
9. Something unpronounceable off the menu. He’s trying to impress you. Either he looked up how to pronounce it beforehand so he can wow you with his knowledge of foreign languages, or he actually already knew it and he’s just a douchebag.
10. Chicken nuggets. Get out.
11. The buffet. You’re at Red Lobster and this guy can’t resist a bargain. If you marry him, get ready to live the life of an extreme couponer.
12. Nachos. This dude is really chill. He’s like a SoCal version of the burger guy. He thinks everything is hilarious. He’s also probably high right now.
13. Pizza. He’s a Nacho guy that wants you to take him seriously.
14. “The usual.” He takes all his dates here. Either that, or he comes here with his parents all the time. So either he’s a serial dater or the third wheel on all his parents’ dates.
15. Ice cream. He is an unsupervised 8-year-old.
16. Cheesy Gordita Crunch. You’re in a Taco Bell. It’s all downhill from here.
17. Salad. This is the steak for guys who want to be like, “I’m watching what I eat. I’m really health-conscious.” It’s a way for him to launch into his tirade against the meat industry and the triumphs of veganism and healthy eating. It’s basically the world’s worst icebreaker. He also might be a giant rabbit.”
Hopefully no matter what he orders, he’s hungry for love!