The Importance of Loving Yourself First
We are part of a society that has grown to become extremely shallow. We were born and raised to magazines and TV’s portraying only the sexiest celebrities and obsessing over their “pretty” lives. Walking up to someone to introduce yourself or saying some phrase that will catch their attention has become old school. Before you know it you’re all grown up and ready to find a lover but there is one thing in your way, and that’s who you are. Most cases of “perfect” looking bodies with abs or a thin waist all go back to genetics. There are many people who exercise religiously but their body build is different than another persons body build. Thus, we have ended up with a society that is too depressed regarding their imperfect looks, and we come up with this belief that if we didn’t have the magazine cover worthy genes, then why try? We live in a society that has become too depressed because of focusing on the ideas they have shoved in our faces through media. Happiness has been connected to attractiveness and success, leaving the “imperfect” hopeless and upset.
If we cared for ourselves and our well-being, mentally and physically, we wouldn’t allow ideas, perceptions, and opinions from others to dictate our happiness or content with who we are. A human being is only human because of having a consciousness and emotion. When we connect to another human being, in whatever form it is, brother, child, or lover, it is all a soul connection. If you look at the people that truly love you in your life, they haven’t accepted you into their lives because of how much you weigh or what color hair you have chosen.
So why do we impose or allow this idea of perfection that society portrays for us in? Why has it become what dictates our self worth? Why can’t we accept that we are imperfectly perfect?
Stop looking for the love you can’t give yourself by finding someone to give it to. This makes it extremely hard for the person that has found so many quirks they love about you, in and out, to be with you. All you will end up with is love that you are receiving but you cant allow in because you don’t trust it, and that ends up turning off your lover. The relationship ends up being about them trying to prove their love to you and all the reasons to why they love you. Sooner or later your lover will be fed up with how high maintenance it is to get you to let them love you.
Long sentence short, if you cant love yourself, don’t burden someone with expecting them to also teach you how to love yourself. It’s unfair. Maybe you could meet that person that can convince you that you are truly worthy, but that is a rare case and that isn’t what a relationship is about. It’s about compromise and support.
Many people use Tinder and other dating sites that are all based on your looks, which many people end up with a ‘catfish’ which is a term used to explain fake profiles. If you are using these sites, and you have no self worth, don’t. This will only depress you more. Let go of all these sites, and all these online personas that give you the ‘perfect’ looking person and life. Even these perfect looking people are usually not happy. Especially if they’re addicted to updating their Instagram’s and Facebook religiously. They are trying to prove a happy life online that doesn’t seem so easy to do in reality. But that’s the point to life, to live your reality and make anything you want out of it!
Take time out and pinpoint what type of person you would like to be. The whole of a human being is much bigger than focusing it on looks. We have so much to learn about the world and about each other, if we all based our lovers on their looks, the world would be a terrible place. Not every pretty looking face is a pretty human being. And if that person lacks any type of charisma or a personality that defines who they are, then what’s the point? A relationship is not only based on sex, which rarely is even identified as love making because of how shallow sex has become. A relationship is loving and at the same time being frustrated with some traits of your lover, but that’s what makes them your lover. Love isn’t perfect and it’s hard to commit to. So why don’t we understand that following what society thinks as attractive is not correct and the only perfect in this society are the unique imperfects. Praise your imperfect perfections and let go of all the things they have brainwashed you to think.
Start looking for that light you lost within you, and nourish the child within you. Your body deserves the love you refused to let in, so start by giving yourself love from you.