05
Sep

In Joan Rivers Fashion She Once Joked About Her Funeral…

Fox News reports, “In typical Joan Rivers fashion, the TV icon detailed an over-the-top plan for exactly how she wanted her funeral to go down in her 2012 no-holds-barred book “I Hate Everyone…Starting With Me.”

“When I die (and yes, Melissa, that day will come; and yes, Melissa, everything’s in your name), I want my funeral to be a huge showbiz affair with lights, cameras, action … I want Craft services, I want paparazzi and I want publicists making a scene!” Rivers wrote. “I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don’t want some rabbi rambling on; I want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents. I don’t want a eulogy; I want Bobby Vinton to pick up my head and sing ‘Mr. Lonely.’ I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag.

“And I want a wind machine so that even in the casket my hair is blowing just like Beyonce’s.”

Her final sendoff will be less extravagant than what she described in her book. Rivers’ funeral will be private at New York City’s Temple Emanu-El on Sunday, according to her publicist. Also, in keeping with Jewish tradition, the Upper East Side temple does not hold open-casket services, according to the synagogue.

Rivers died after she suffered complications from a medical procedure and was placed on life support. She was 81.

“I hate people who die of natural causes; they just don’t understand the moment,” Rivers wrote in her book. “It’s the grand finale, act three, the eleven o’clock number — make it count. If you’re going to die, die interesting! Is there anything worse than a boring death? I think not.”

Yorkville Endoscopy, the clinic she was at during her procedure on Aug. 28 when she stopped breathing and went into cardiac arrest, is being investigated by the Department of Health. The NYC Medical Examiner’s Office is also investigating Rivers’ death.

Rivers was no fan of condolences either. She once wrote, “I hate people who try to make you feel better. Like… the minister who says, ‘He’s in a better place now.’ I’m tempted to yell out, ‘No he’s not. He had a house in the Hamptons. What’s wrong with you?'”

A rep for the sharp-tongued icon told us the Rivers family has requested donations, instead of flowers, be sent in her memory.

“In lieu of flowers donations can be made to God’s Love We Deliver, Guide Dogs for the Blind or Our House Grief Support Center.””

 

R.I.P. Joan Rivers!

 

 

 

Source: Fox News

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